Self-Awareness Worksheet for Recovering People Pleasers
- Jillian Lawrence
- Jun 12
- 2 min read
Updated: Jun 26
✨ STEP 1: NOTICE THE PATTERN
Make note of any of these that feel familiar:
I say yes even when I don’t have the time or energy
I don't like to disappoint people
I often don't speak up when I disagree with someone
I'm often very indecisive and don't know what I want
I feel responsible for other people’s feelings
I say “I’m fine” when I know I'm not
I worry people won’t like me if I disagree with them or have a boundary
If you marked more than two, welcome to the club. Let’s gently explore what’s going on underneath.
🧠 STEP 2: MINDFUL CHECK-IN
Next time you're about to say yes to something, pause and ask:
What am I feeling in my body right now?(Tense jaw, shallow breath, tight chest? Just notice.)
Am I saying yes from fear, guilt, or habit?(Or from a genuine desire to help?)
What do I need in this moment?(Rest, clarity, space to decide?)
If I say yes, what am I saying no to?(My own rest, priorities, time with family?)
💭 STEP 3: JOURNAL PROMPTS
These questions will help uncover the deeper beliefs behind your people-pleasing patterns:
What did I learn about being “good” growing up?
When did I first feel it wasn’t safe to disappoint someone?
What do I fear will happen if I set a boundary?
How do I want to feel in my relationships moving forward?
🛑 STEP 4: YOUR NEW MANTRA MENU
Pick one or two to keep in your notes app or mirror:
“I can care about others without betraying myself.”
“A kind no is still kind.”
“I am not responsible for how others feel about my boundaries.”
“Discomfort is not danger.”
“My needs matter too.”
🧘 STEP 5: THE PEOPLE-PLEASER PAUSE
When you’re caught in the spiral, try this:
Inhale and silently say: “This moment is safe.”
Exhale and say: “I don’t have to decide right now.”
Repeat until your nervous system softens. Then respond from a place of clarity.
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